That could well be a resolution for this year: frustrate other people less.
It may seem a bit negative, but it is positive nonetheless. Because we all frustrate others - and often without realizing it.
This manifests itself in the fact that others avoid us, do not listen to us properly, do things differently than we imagine, and so on.
This issue is as relevant in your family (or have you never frustrated your teenagers, if you have any?) as it is, of course, to your leadership in the professional environment.
For the purists of psychology, here's a clarification: you can't frustrate others directly, but you can certainly influence them so that they become frustrated.
Either way, the crucial question remains:
I always emphasize that the questions we ask are more crucial to our success than the answers.
This is all the more true in leadership. Because by asking questions, you direct thoughts, both in yourself and in others.
There are empowering and disempowering questions. The former make you think about meaningful answers that take us forward. The latter lead to a dead end, because they hardly allow an answer that brings us ahead.
(👉 If you want to practice the technique of asking the right questions, the best way is to come to my coaching. ➔ You can find suitable programs here).
Because of the high importance of questions to your own success and the success of your entire team, I recommend that you create a set of empowering questions.
We live in interesting times, I think. The speed of change is increasing and the uncertainties are growing. And that is likely to intensify.
So far, so familiar. As in any time - whether stable or rather not - there are winners and losers. There are people and companies that tend to benefit from the uncertainties, and those that tend to suffer.
The good news is that which group you belong to is largely a choice. Those who are better than the average consciously or unconsciously choose to see things differently and focus on the opportunity that promises the greatest chance of winning.
To do that, it's good to know (or assume) which success factors are becoming more important than others in each case.
Here are three topics that, in my view, will become much more important this year - and for which I therefore recommend that you consider how you can become better at them with your team:
The past year has had its share of peculiarities, from the uncertainty caused by the pandemic to the disrupted supply chains.
Many business leaders are reporting new challenges that didn't exist before or were less prevalent.
From my own experience and my numerous conversations with leaders from all kinds of industries, I have distilled some key "learning points."
Welcome to the new year! I hope you had a pleasant start and begin the new year full of motivation and confidence.
My first question for this year as food for thought may seem a bit unusual: "What will you become better at this year?" Or, "What will you be significantly better at in 12 months than you are today?"
After all, most people tend to talk about goals and resolutions now. While this has its merits (I'm a big proponent of the importance of grand objectives), it often neglects a crucial aspect:
The biggest lever for your results and success is your own level in your thinking, behavior and skills.
That's why I suggest that right from the start you make sure that you get better in one important aspect every week. This requires systematic work on it.
Admittedly, the question in the headline may seem strange to you. Very few people associate "happiness" with leadership.
And wrongly so. After all, if you're going to put in all the hard work and overtime that usually comes with leadership positions, you don't want to be unhappy in the process, do you?
Quite a few don't let this consideration get to them. I love to ask my clients at the outset of our work relationship, "Are you happy doing what you do?"
Here's another hint: If you ask parents what they want most for their children, the number one answer you'll hear is, "That they're happy!"
So if it's most important to us for our loved ones to be happy, why not in leadership? And especially at this time of year, I think it's an obvious thought.
So, are you happy in what you do at work? And are the people on your team?
Because if you and your people are, everyone will enjoy performing at a higher level and have more fun doing it.
I experience this all the time: decisions are made, but not implemented. Tasks are delegated, but not completed as expected. Deadlines are set but not met. And so on.
In other words, I hear leaders moan time and again, "Oh, if only I could rely on my people!"
Why is that? Why do we humans often find it so difficult to do what others say? And conversely, why does it seem so hard to get others to do what I expect them to do?
If, on the other hand, you succeed, the increases in productivity and motivation are enormous.
"How can I change the mindset of my people?" is a question I am often asked.
The background is that a team can of course only perform really well and have fun doing so if the people in it have a winning mindset.
Unfortunately, the reality is often different: People play on hold, refuse full responsibility, blame other people or other things for difficulties, don't work well together, and so on.
That's why the question of how to change the mindset keeps coming up.
Over the years as a leadership coach and from my own studies, I've been able to peel out an arsenal of methods that work well.
Top leaders form top teams. In my experience, this aspect, which is simple in itself, is often neglected in leadership coaching and training.
Why is this important? Well, one's own team is simply THE lever for greater influence and more success.
What many leaders pay too little attention to - and accordingly focus too little on - is the targeted development of the team into a winning team.
The goal is that this team, in principle without the leader, sustainably delivers top performance, takes full responsibility and enjoys doing so.
That may sound too bold, but it is achievable and unfortunately not very common.
It's simple: you'll fall far short of your potential in life and in your career if you don't have a handle on your productivity.
Most leaders I know - and people in general - either feel overwhelmed all the time, or they're not sure they're investing their time in the most important activities. Or both.
What's the key to massively increased productivity? It's what I call "time mastery": you decide what you invest in every minute of your life.
Maybe that sounds idealistic, but think about people you see as exemplary on the topic of productivity and success. Do they give you the impression that they are constantly controlled by others? Quite the opposite: they determine their priorities themselves - at least significantly more than the average person.
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