‼️ Be Careful What You Say!

Our language is an interesting tool: we use it to influence not only others, but also ourselves.

"How am I supposed to know what I think before I hear what I say?" is a well-known and true saying.

If you keep saying the same thing about yourself, whether positive or negative, you will end up believing it. You can't help it. Therefore, be careful how you talk about yourself.

But another aspect of language is just as important: others connect us to what we say, not just the content, but the way we say something and how often we say it.

This becomes especially clear in presentations and video recordings (which I regularly recommend to all leaders): your messages consist of much more than your content.

You could even say that your content conveys the least amount of influencing energy.

So how can you improve your language to become more persuasive and influential?

Here are three concrete tips with immediate effect from the multitude of possibilities:

1. Delete words of doubt.

   Words like “just a bit" or "maybe" in many cases expose your doubts to yourself and to others. Quite simply, they come across as much less convincing. If you observe the use of such words frequently by yourself, ask why you are uncertain. If you eliminate these uncertainties, you will also find it easier to omit such words.
2. Use the indicative instead of the conditional tense.
   
I always find it remarkable how often even experienced leaders speak in the conditional tense instead of making clear statements. They say "we could try to increase sales slightly" instead of "our goal is to increase sales by 10%". The difference is enormous in effect, especially because you are expressing uncertainty to yourself. The use of the conditional tense in this context leaves you with a back door if it doesn't work out. But that is precisely the reason for lack of conviction. Therefore: replace the use of the conditional with the indicative. Almost always!
3. No labelling of self or others.

   We are programmed to try to categorize others (and ourselves) as quickly as possible. "She's always late." Or "he never does his job." Beware: the more you assign such labels, the more they will prove true for you. On the other hand, you will have the greatest influence if you approach others openly. Because the labels always come from the past. And this does not have to correspond to the future.

It is important that you work on these points regularly in order to get better. A sparring partner or coach works wonders for this.

Next steps:

When you're ready, check out my ➔ coaching programs and set up ➔ a 15min appointment here to get to know each other.