How to squander your influence

leadership May 07, 2021

Why do I keep talking and writing about the topic of influence? Well, it’s quite simple: because you cannot lead without influence.

Often, it helps us to be aware of what we are doing wrong and how we are reducing our influence as a result. Because if we then turn these points around, we increase our influence and thus the quality of our leadership.

It is best to think of a situation in which you did not achieve with others what you actually wanted. Maybe they didn't really listen to you or didn't really understand you. Or they didn't see what you really wanted.

Whatever the case, there can be many reasons for a lack of influence. Here are three of the top ones you're messing up your influence with:
  1. Not seeing what others are already influenced by. It's an old adage that you can only influence others with what already influences them. It's the same with yourself: if someone else tries to get you to do something that doesn't exist in your mind's breadth at that moment, you will always reject it first. So, the trick is to first find a "hook" that is anchored in the current world of thoughts. If this is too abstract for you, just contact me for a conversation.
  2. Being too rational. Logic gets people to think. Emotions cause actions. Pure logic won't get you far with others. You must always find the emotion in what you want. Unfortunately, the practice in leadership often looks exactly the opposite - with frustrating consequences.
  3. Not being authentic. We always have a good sense of whether the other person means what they say. The problem is, if you as a manager are not fully convinced of what you want to influence others with, they will unconsciously refuse. The good news: this can be worked on.

Once you're ready, let's talk about how you can systematically increase your influence as a leader. Simply schedule a 20-minute conversation here.

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