Beware of your words!

leadership Aug 17, 2017

WHAT you say can change A LOT. HOW you say it can change EVERYTHING.” 

Some behaviors for peak performance are very easy to understand, but extremely difficult to implement. This includes the way we express ourselves as we speak. 

The point is this: the words you use say more about you than what you “actually” want to say. I always experience this: the team members are enthusiastic about their project and generate meaningful results. Consequently, the team leader should say a few words of appreciation. What do the team members who think of themselves as having shown outstanding performance hear? “Yes, you have done it quite well. With the results, we can probably start something,” or the like.     

What is the statement? Most will understand: “This was not at all an acceptable performance.” 

And here comes the worst: most of the time, the boss is not even aware of his flaws. He really wanted to say something motivating. And he did not notice how he sabotaged himself and his team. 

This example is not even extreme. I am experiencing this repeatedly:

Most people sabotage their own effects through a sloppy use of language. 

Here’s the tip for today: Record when you talk (this works today with every smartphone), and count afterwards how many relativizing, derogatory, and filling words you’ve used. Most are often shocked by the results. 

In the next memo, I’ll provide you with a few tips on how to work on the root causes of this phenomenon. 

On your positive and effective language!
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